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A 19-year-old woman is selling her virginity for $15,000 through an Australian escort agency.
A photo of a brown-haired girl with her face blurred out appears on the MyOutCall website. It lists her name as MOC Virgin and there is a Chinese flag beside her name. The listing says she’s a student who speaks English and Mandarin and lists her “speciality” as “virgin.”
The website says she “must be sold” by Dec. 12.
Last week, the editorial offices of French satire magazine Charlie Hebdo were firebombed after the release of an issue “guest edited” by Muhammed. (“100 lashes if you don’t die of laughter!” said the cartoon Muhammed on the cover.)
The magazine’s website was taken over shortly after that by a Turkish hackers group, who left a threatening message reading, “You keep abusing Islam’s almighty Prophet with disgusting and disgraceful cartoons using excuses of freedom of speech…Be God’s Curse On You! We Will be Your Curse on Cyber World!” Politicians and the media came out in support of the magazine’s right to free speech, while French Muslim groups decried racism. Amidst it all and against all odds, the newly homeless Hebdo got its next issue out on schedule. Yup! There it is, the new cover, right above us. This is not going to end well.
An HIV positive couple will stand trial accused of attacking police officers after refusing to stop having sex in a public swimming pool.
Local resident Jeffrey Knutson, 34, was all set to commit suicide this week, until he learned of Lindsay Lohan’s deal to pose nude for Playboy.
“I had the pills on the table,” said Knutson. “I was literally doing the final edits on my suicide note in Google Docs.”
According to Knutson, confirmation of Lohan’s photo shoot appeared in his RSS feed while he was proofreading what was supposed to be his last email ever. He was looking for synonyms on thesaurus.com when the news broke.
“There’s been rumours about her doing this for a long time,” said Knutson. “But when her mom confirmed it on TMZ, I knew it was for real. I just couldn’t miss it.”
Knutson, a Business Operations Analyst for the city of Calgary, said he has been planning to kill himself every three or four months for at least the last five years.
“Initially, I thought last Sunday would be the perfect day to end it. I’d been on my fourth failed Internet date in a month, and it seemed like a good day to throw in the towel. But then I heard the news about Lindsay, and I realized I probably won’t be able to see these pictures if I’m not alive.”
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Stephen Colbert was roundly criticized by politicos last year for his tongue-in-cheek congressional testimony on the plight of illegal farm workers, but now he’s getting to revel in his own prescience.
Stephen Colbert’s Congressional Testimony
Last year, the hacked emails of climate scientists from the University of East Anglia spawned what has hitherto become known as “Climategate — a mini media tempest that briefly provided climate change deniers with what they believed to be grist for their favorite mill: that climate change is some sort of worldwide conspiratorial scam. There was never a whole lot to hang a scandal on, but that didn’t stop the frenzy that pushed “Climategate” onto front pages and network news shows.
