Archive for April, 2009

Bill Murray Hospitalizes Woman With Golf Shot

Posted: 17th April 2009 by Sus Scrofa in Sports
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LUTZ, Fla. – Actor Bill Murray hooked a tee shot so badly during a Pro-Am event on Friday that the ball sailed across a street next to the hole and hit a woman in her front yard. She was knocked to the ground and had to go to the hospital.

The idea of paying $20 for a hamburger at a Minor League ballpark seems a bit absurd, don’t you think? In this economy, fans are looking for value above all else. No one seems particularly anxious to indulge themselves, unless they have recently awakened from a decade-long coma. But context is everything. The West Michigan [...]

LOS ANGELES (Reuters Life!) – Playboy magazine on Friday named the University of Miami as the top party school in the United States based on five criteria that included a nod to brainpower.

Parents BBQ Their Child to Avoid Funeral Costs

Posted: 17th April 2009 by Sus Scrofa in Randomness
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One of the most vile acts of non-human behavior has happened in Detroit with two animals disguised as human parents.  Animals may even be disgusted with me for saying that because they have more respect for life than these low lifes.  It appears that there was constant abuse in the home, but from what’s been [...]

Pirate Bay Founders Jailed in Sweden

Posted: 17th April 2009 by Simo Häyhä in Randomness
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A court in Sweden has jailed four men behind The Pirate Bay (TPB), the world’s most high-profile file-sharing website, in a landmark case. Frederik Neij, Gottfrid Svartholm Warg, Carl Lundstrom and Peter Sunde were found guilty of breaking copyright law and were sentenced to a year in jail.

Over 1,500 farmers in an Indian state committed suicide after being driven to debt by crop failure, it was reported today. The agricultural state of Chattisgarh was hit by falling water levels.”The water level has gone down below 250 feet here. It used to be at 40 feet a few years ago,” Shatrughan Sahu, a [...]

Gushing from a glacier, rust-stained Blood Falls contains evidence that microbes have survived in prehistoric seawater deep under ice for perhaps millions of years, a new study says. The colony of microscopic life-forms may have been trapped when Antarctica’s then advancing Taylor Glacier reached into the ocean 1.5 to 4 million years ago.

With their flowing blonde hair, hourglass figures and slender, toned legs, they could easily pass for twins. Both look fabulous in their matching polka dot dresses and, as Janet and Jane Cunliffe happily recount, potential boyfriends often struggle to tell them apart. Hardly surprising, as both weigh in at 8st and, save for a couple [...]

Two cannibals have been feasting on the remains of their brother for the last six months in an effort to hide his murder, it was revealed today.

He is a typical man of age – a few white hairs cover his round head and he wears dentures. But 75-year-old Shigeo Tokuda sat on a movie set on Monday wearing just a silk kimono and loin cloth about to have sex on film with a woman who is younger than his daughter.

A police force appears to have some Star Wars fans in its midst, after eight of its officers recorded their religion as “Jedi”, it was revealed today.